


must be heaven where you come from (by your side, i feel alive)

by bloodaccusedstones



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Christmas Fluff but from Carmilla's POV, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-20
Updated: 2014-12-20
Packaged: 2018-03-02 08:54:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2806757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bloodaccusedstones/pseuds/bloodaccusedstones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You unwrap the gift slowly and gently; no one has given you something before. You pull out a book by Nietzsche, and he remembered that you enjoy Nietzsche’s work. You feel like crying because not a lot of people remember much about you. Laura digs her head into your neck and you thank her father quietly. He nods and walks away. Laura untangles herself from you and you head up the stairs and place the book gently on your bed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	must be heaven where you come from (by your side, i feel alive)

**Author's Note:**

> Another lengthy one. Thanks to lesbae's idea, I decided to write, "you look so beautiful in this light (all that you are is all that i'll ever need)", in Carmilla's POV. I whipped this one out real quick. Enjoy.  
> Somehow this one is longer, I have no idea how that happened.

/// 

Laura is running towards her father and you get out of the car. She jumps into his bear hug and you feel a tug inside of you. You had been grateful to Laura for letting (making) you come to her house for Christmas. You didn’t want to intrude but she insisted that you were perfectly welcomed. You reluctantly agreed; it has been so long since you’ve been outside Silas, it’s your home, you don’t have anywhere else to go. 

You hang around the door of the car and watch them interact. This is their moment, you don’t want to interrupt. 

Laura’s father lets go of Laura and looks at you. He’s smiling and he looks at you with such curiosity but he's giving you a look that says, “I swear on everything that is holy, one wrong move and I will scalp you.” 

You gulp and suddenly feel really nervous, you’re a centuries old vampire that has seen more death and loss than anyone could ever think of, and you’re struck down by a look from your roommate's (girlfriend's? lover's?) overprotective father. Laura is suddenly in your face and leading you towards her father and introducing you to him. 

“Pleasure to meet you, sir.” You shake his hand firmly, and he’s smiling, so you guess that means a good thing. 

“Well, let’s get you both settled in, yeah? It was a long drive and I’m sure you’re both exhausted.” He walks over to the trunk and you follow him and grab the bags; just because he may or may not scare the shit out of you doesn’t mean you can’t be chivalrous. You look at Laura and she turns towards the little two-story house and walks inside. 

You follow her (you’d follow her anywhere). 

///

You had set down the bags for just a second and Laura had snuck up from underneath you and grabbed them, then scurried up the stairs. You stood in the living room, taking in all the decor and pictures that lined the wall. “So, you’re Laura’s roommate, huh?” 

“Yes, sir, I am.” You turn to look at him. He looks threatening; he’s a very tall man with broad shoulders and a lot of muscle, has some scruff, wearing flannel (you assume the Hollis family really likes flannel) and glasses. 

“Hm, it’s good to meet you, Carmilla. Maybe we can share embarrassing stories about Laura sometime, yeah?” You huff a laugh at that and he just grins. He points up the stairs. 

“Her room’s the second door on the left. I’ll let you get acquainted with the house.” 

“Thank you.” You practically leap up the stairs. 

///

She’s looking around her bedroom, so you knock against the door frame. She jumps a little and turns to look at you. You walk into her room and look around. She says this is her room like you didn’t know that already (there’s Doctor Who posters everywhere) and she leads you into the guest bedroom. The walls are a light grey and there’s two large windows the let in a lot of light and have a good view of the giant oak tree in the lawn. 

You like it. 

///

So far, you’re surviving dinner. Mr. Hollis has been very interested in you, asking questions about your studies and whatnot (you hope he’s not planning on killing you later. It would be very hard to explain that you’re already dead). 

“So, Carmilla, you’ve been takin care of my Laura, have you?” He asks and continues eating. You laugh because seriously, Laura has saved you from yourself and that’s all you could’ve ever asked for. Laura jumps and swings her head over to you and says,

“Hey! I can take care of myself.” You’re smiling so hard your cheeks are starting to ache because she can take care of herself, she’s proven that to you time and time again, and between the both of you, she’s not the one that needed saving. 

“Actually, sir, she’s been taking care of me.” 

Because that’s the honest truth. 

///

Laura’s laughing and you really want to throw another empty box at her. It’s bad enough that you’re wearing a stupid grumpy cat sweater (Laura convinced you to wear it; it was a moment of weakness) but her father put a Santa hat on you, and it scared you a bit, and now she won’t stop laughing. 

You dig into another box of Christmas ornaments and seriously, how many decorations can two people have? Laura leaves the room and her father messes with the top of the hat. You look up at him, and he has the biggest shit-eating grin on his face, and you guess it’s contagious because you find yourself smiling too. 

“It’s been a long time since I’ve heard her laugh like that.” He whispers and he looks so sad and you find yourself saying, 

“Let’s make it our mission, then.” He nods and not looking at you like you’re a danger anymore, and it’s been so long that someone has looked at you like that (except Laura) and you hand him more ornaments. 

You feel welcome here. 

///

You’re in your bedroom (well, the guest bedroom) and you’ve just finished a bag of blood and you miss her. She’s right down the hallway and you just said goodnight and you miss her. It’s so sappy you want to throw up all over yourself. But you miss her and you’ve shared a room with her for so long, it feels strange without her sleeping next to you. So you do what you probably shouldn’t; you teleport into her room. 

///

Her room is bathed in moonlight and you know she probably can’t see you because you landed in the darkest corner of the room. You look at her for a while, she’s so beautiful with her hair draped over her shoulder and the moonlight reflecting off her brown eyes. You walk over to the bedside and put your knee on it. The bed dips and Laura shifts to let you slide next to her. You lay there, staring at her because she is so pretty, it takes all your words away. 

She leans over and kisses you deeply. You groan and feel her hand wrapping around your head, tugging you closer to her. You grab her waist and pull her on top of you and she places her hands of the sides of your head. You drag your nails down her back and she groans, then grinds against you and holy fuck, you moan and grab her ass, pushing her hips down into yours. She sucks on your neck and oh my god that is so hot, you cant your hips up against her so hard you're worried you might have jolted her off of you. Her hands slip under your shirt and rest against your abs and she’s panting into your mouth and you’re sure you’re panting, too. 

She’s kissing you with such unfiltered want that you’ve never felt before. You have slept with tons of girls, but it was all for the sacrifice and never emotional. It was all business. You’ve never slept with anyone you’ve loved before, and suddenly you feel your chest swell with happiness and you had forgotten what that felt like. She pulls away from you and you grunt, why the hell did she stop? 

“Carm?” She looks worried and you scrunch your forehead, then you realize you’re crying. You shake your head, kiss her hard and start moving your hips again. She pushes your hips down and holds them against the mattress. “Baby?” 

“It’s-it’s nothing.” It’s not a big deal, you don’t want to make it a big deal. You just want to keep kissing her. 

“Carmilla?” She says your name with such gentleness, like you could shatter any second, and you don’t remember the last time someone even cared about your soft edges, and you end up crying a little harder because you love her so much. 

“I’m just- thank you for bringing me to your house. I’m just really happy.” 

“Baby.” She whispers and she sounds so sad. You shake your head because you love her so, so much and she doesn’t even know what she’s done for you. She rolls off you and pulls you into her, you feel her front press against you and your legs tangle together. She kisses your neck and you feel her nose rest in between your neck and shoulder. You curl into her; her warmth envelops you and you don’t want her to leave. You hang onto her because everything you love has a tendency of dying, and you don’t want to lose her. 

///

You roll out of her arms in the morning, you’re so tired, and you’re about to teleport back into your room when you look back at Laura. She’s so small, curled in her bed with the sheets tossed everywhere. Her hair is fanned across her pillow and she’s drooling slightly, which makes you smile; she’s so adorkable and you can’t help but love this tiny human. 

You poof back into your room, get dressed in skinny jeans and a loose t-shirt, and head down the stairs. Mr. Hollis is sitting in the living room, looking at photos, you assume of Laura. He looks up at you and smiles softly; it’s 7 am and he’s wearing flannel pants, a long sleeve shirt, holding a cup of coffee, glasses slightly tilted and hair a mess and he looks so tired. 

You smile and grab a cup of coffee from the kitchen, then sit next to him. You’ve learned that he might look dangerous, but he’s a teddy bear. He nudges you and nods towards the photos he’s holding. He hands some to you and you take them. You’re greeted with Laura as a child, missing a tooth and smiling at the camera. 

///

“She used to snore so loud as a kid.” 

“Really?” 

“Mh-hm. So loud it would shake the foundation.”

“She doesn’t snore anymore.”

“She hasn’t done that since she was a kid. She drools now.”

“Yeah, she does.” You laugh. You’ve been sitting next to Laura’s father for a while; your coffee’s gone cold and the sun is brighter. There are photographs littered all around the two of you and you’ve been listening to stories from Mr. Hollis. He hands you a picture of Laura as an infant, and she’s so tiny, swaddled in cloth and you think about her this morning. 

“She was a newborn in that one.” He whispers. 

“She was so tiny.”

“She always was.”

“It’s easy to forget how tiny she is. Her personality is just so big, it takes up a lot of room.” You look at the one he's holding out to you. He’s cradling the photo, being gentle, so you know it’s important to him. You take it gently and look at it. There’s Laura as a child and a woman is standing next to her. It looks like they’re in a yard somewhere and you think it’s the park Laura took you to earlier. They both look alike, same grin, same hair. “Is this her mother?”

“Yes.” 

“She looks just like her.”

“Hmm.”

“I don’t mean to intrude but, what happened to her?” You turn your head towards him; he looks at the ground and when he speaks, it’s with so much pain, and you’ve felt that hurt before when your family had died. 

“She...she died… when Laura was young. Car accident.”

“I’m very sorry, Mr. Hollis.” Because you really are. 

“Thank you. It’s been difficult. Her mother would be so proud of her. Laura told me of your family, and I am sorry for your loss. Kids your age shouldn’t know what grief is.”

“Thank you, sir.”

You shuffle through more photos and you feel like a part of this family. Memories are so sacred and he’s giving you all of them. 

“She would’ve like you, her mother.”

“I would have loved to met her. Anyone that’s a part of this family is a lovely person, sir.”

He smiles.

///

“Are you dating my daughter, Carmilla?” He speaks so suddenly, you jump a bit. You gulp, his threatening glare from the first day runs through your head and you really don’t want to fuck anything up, but he’s so soft with you now, and you think that since he really likes you, you might as well be honest. 

“I’m not sure, sir. We, uh, we care about each other, but we’ve never really talked about it.” 

“Do you love my daughter?” You still. You do, you really do, but there’s so much that follows those words and you don’t want to admit it because you can’t lose her. He's looking at you with such honesty, and he's been so open with you that you can't lie to him.

“Yes, sir. I do.”

“I could tell anyway.” 

You burst into laughter, the way he said that with such pride in himself was so funny. You’re relieved he didn’t whip out a machete from behind his back, and you lean against his arm. He starts laughing and at that moment, Laura walks down the stairs looking so confused. 

You joke about her snoring with her father and you both end up with cramping stomachs from laughing so hard and Laura throws that blasted Santa hat at you, and yeah, you could get used to this. 

///

You end up sitting on the stairs later that night with Laura curled into you and you know her father knows about you two, so you don’t worry about him decapitating you anytime soon. The living room looks like Christmas threw up all over it. There’s Christmas decorations everywhere, you’re practically drowning in it. The Christmas tree has its lights on and the fireplace is lit (Laura was shocked when you suggested lighting it) and the two combined give off a lovely glow.  
Mr. Hollis walks up to you and hands you a present. You’re confused, you haven’t really celebrated Christmas before (everyone you love has died, except for Laura) and you grab it from his hands slowly. 

“I was going to wait for Christmas, but I think you’ll enjoy it now.” 

You unwrap the gift slowly and gently; no one has given you something before. You pull out a book by Nietzsche, and he remembered that you enjoy Nietzsche’s work. You feel like crying because not a lot of people remember much about you. Laura digs her head into your neck and you thank her father quietly. He nods and walks away. Laura untangles herself from you and you head up the stairs and place the book gently on your bed. 

///

You head into the kitchen because you haven't eaten any human food yet, and you don't want Mr. Hollis noticing. You bump into Laura and you laugh, because she was probably getting some hot chocolate or cookies. Something green catches you eye and you look up, it’s a mistletoe. You curse her father because he probably put it there. When you look back at Laura, she pulls you down to her and kisses you softly. You chuckle because she tastes like hot chocolate (you guessed right) and walk past her to grab a yogurt. 

By the time you finish and walk into the living room, Laura has disappeared and her father is standing by the tree, arms folded and gazing at it. You stand next to him and look at the tree. It’s decorated beautifully, the ornaments reflect the light off of them. 

“That hat and sweater made me look twelve, didn't it?” You whisper. He looks confused for a second, then starts laughing really loudly. You join him because you know you probably did look twelve wearing those ridiculous items.

This is the happiest you’ve ever felt and you hold onto it. You never imagined your happiness would be with Laura and her father, but if you were honest with yourself, you wouldn’t have it any other way.


End file.
